Undeserving
by Nayru Elric
Summary: He couldn't stand it when people were nice to him. He couldn't. Not when he was always mean to them. Light KuruMois one shot. (May add more chapters if I get more Kururu ideas.)


**Kururu Presents: Undeserving – de arimasu**

Kururu so often spent his day in his lair of computers and other tech that invasion meetings became a sort of day-breaker for him – always entertaining from the trivial disputes and intentions of the other members. Observing them from the background, he'd quietly chuckle to himself, and occasionally add to the excitement with a clever remark that'd make _someone_ – or everyone – tick.

Today was no different.

Keroro slapped the table and pointed at the screen behind him while explaining his plans for invasion in excruciating detail.

Tamama called out his flirtatious approval and praise to flatter him.

Giroro input that he'd only participate if there were lots of explosions and weaponry (or if he'd get to be involved with Natsumi in some way).

Dororo admonished his ideals of bringing about a peaceful way to invade Pekopon – though anyone seldom listened to him.

They were indeed interesting to watch, but none of them ever gained any progress. That was perfectly fine with Kururu. Whether they invaded or not wasn't really his to decide. These invasion meetings always ended in one of two ways:

1) Their leader ordering them to partake in another one of his fruitless attempts to complete a single successful invasion.

Or 2) everyone gets fed up with everyone else in some way or another – whether it be violent and dramatic, that would depend – and they end up parting ways until the next invasion meeting.

Kururu was never the cause of either of these two outcomes. The others _always_ played it out for him. It never failed; someone always ended up irking someone else, and whoop there went their so-called teamwork spirit.

The invasion plan that could-only-lead-to-another-flunk this time was this: Remove the screens of all windows in Pekoponian homes so that during the summer months they'd become so irritated with insects they'd have no choice but to buy bug spray (produced and distributed to stores by the Keroro Platoon) which, once released into the air, would render them all helpless and obeying.

"And so, a successful invasion, de arimas!" Keroro concluded, thrusting one fist into the air energetically and stepping onto the table before him, switching to the last slide on the slideshow projected on the screen behind him to provide a visual. At the podium-planning table beside him, Angol Mois threw confetti, dressed in one of her dark maroon-purple showgirl outfits, a dazzling smile spreading her lips.

"That could work," Giroro agreed after thinking it over. "But how would we obtain the necessary equipment and funding to produce all the supplies we'd need, and to ship it around Pekopon?"

Keroro remained frozen in his victorious pose, turning pale.

"Yeah, and how would we steal all those window screens quickly and without being caught, des-ka?" Tamama asked.

Keroro remained silent with gaffe – obviously not having thought it over quite as thoroughly as he'd explained it.

"Also, we shouldn't steal stuff from the homes of –"

"Kuuukuku~ You forgot another essential fact, Taichou," Kururu pointed out, interrupting Dororo – who looked like an obedient little school kid with his hand still raised as he allowed Kururu to interpose.

"Wh-what would that be, de arimas-ka...?" Keroro stuttered, rotating deliberately toward Kururu while still holding his pose.

"Only half of Pekopon is in the summer season at any given time, and places nearer to the planet's poles don't even have insects due to their freezing temperatures." Kururu gave a short chuckle and focused back on his laptop. "Kuku." _Always such simple factors to wholly contradict their reasoning, _he thought, humored by how easy it had been to take down Keroro's entire plan using only a few short sentences.

Keroro's slideshow clicker dropped to the floor, and he backed down to his chair, a hand to his chin in deep thought. Abruptly, he leaned forward, his hands landing atop the table with a loud smack. Everyone jumped. "That's it!" He waited a moment to build the anticipation. "I'm out of ideas~" he admitted, scratching behind his head. "Let's save this until next invasion meeting, de arima –"

"H-HOLD IT RIGHT THERE!" Giroro ordered, stopping Keroro from getting off his chair by hopping onto the table and shoving one of his rifles in his face.

"Whaaat? It's not like anyone else has any ideas either!" Keroro said.

"You honestly didn't think over any of what we just said before you told us your plan?!" Giroro interrogated, pressing his rifle farther into Keroro's cheek.

"M-maybe not – what does it matter, anyway? We could just –"

Dororo interjected, "Taichou-dono, I'll be taking my leave now if we're done here, de gozaru."

Tamama nodded and acceded, "Me too. Shion and Terara sent Momo-chi and I a seven-foot tall gourmet chocolate cake from France. I'll be going as well, desu."

Dororo and Tamama headed toward the door.

"W-wait!" Keroro called. He smacked Giroro in the face and ran to the door to stop them from leaving.

Kururu closed his laptop and stood, seeing Giroro all-but-unconscious on the table with Angol Mois poking him in the cheek, still dressed in her showgirl outfit, Keroro, Dororo, and Tamama gathered at the doorway. _Typical end-of-the-meeting, kukukuuu~ _"Kukukuuu~"

"What is it, Keroro-kun?" Dororo asked, his head tilting to the side in question – a sigh in his voice.

"I-I don't want to go upstairs only to have Natsumi-dono make me do chores!" Keroro told them. "We should do something else to stall, de arimas."

"But you'll have to do the chores sometime anyway, Gunsou-san," Tamama reasoned.

"I know! How about we have a mini excursion like we tried before, except with just us this time to get to know each other bett –?"

"Idiot! We'd have to go upstairs to get food; there's nothing to eat!" Giroro yelled, coming over with Angol Mois, his arms crossed.

Keroro grinned, a maniacal spark in his eye. "_Gerogerori~_ I have secret stash of food designed specially for a situation like this!" He pointed at Tamama. "Tamama Nitou, you're in charge of choosing out the desserts!"

Tamama snapped into an immediate salute and obeyed. "Yes, sir!"

Keroro pointed at Giroro. "Giroro Gochou, you're to retrieve and cook the sweet potatoes, as well as make the fire for them to be cooked over!"

"Sure," Giroro said.

Keroro pointed at Mois. "Mois-dono, you're to get and set up the tables and silverware, de arimas!"

She saluted, beaming at him warmly. "Hai, Ouji-sama!"

Keroro pointed at Dororo. "Dororo Heichou –!" He paused to think of something for Dororo to bring. "Ano... you can make one of your cannonball rice balls for decoration or something."

"Yosh! You can count on me, Keroro-kun!" He disappeared in a flash of blurred movement.

Keroro searched around the room. "Let's see..."

Kururu took out his one-buttoned device that would bring him back to his lair, about to press it, when Keroro said, "Ah, Kururu Souchou, you wanna bring some of your curry or something?"

Kururu paused. "Kukukuuu~ Didn't forget me, eh?" he questioned, laptop still in hand. In all honesty, Kururu cared little whether they included him or wanted to spend the "excursion" purely among the four of them. But he realized they hadn't. And he hesitated, because it was the fact that they hadn't that surprised him. He found himself confused by an awkward emotion as he realized the platoon never forgot or excluded him, despite Kururu always being indifferent or malicious toward them. And the awkward feeling in his gut was replaced by something close to repulsion, furious at their casualty. Keroro hadn't demanded Kururu bring something. He'd asked if Kururu _wanted_ to bring it.

_"Curry or 'something'?" _he mused._ Oh please. What the hell else do I have to bring?_

"Ku. How petty do you think I am?" Kururu inquired gently, keeping all feeling out of his voice.

Keroro cocked his head to one side. "Eh?"

"You think I want to spend my afternoon with the likes of you when I could be doing far more important things? Kuuukuku~ A pleasantry as simple as an excursion is too boring, especially with you guys."

"JERK! WE WERE JUST TRYING TO BE NICE!" Giroro yelled, fuming and stomping in anger.

"Kururu-senpai, we couldn't have a true excursion without all the platoon members present, desu," Tamama said, giving Kururu his cute pouty face.

Kururu scoffed at them, fixing his glasses. He muttered, "Tch. You're all the same."

Giroro was about to explode again, but Kururu held out his one-buttoned device and clicked the red button on it. He said, "Pojito~!" as he disappeared holographically into thin air.

* * *

_Why should they care whether I'm at the excursion or not? _Kururu wondered, sitting with his arms crossed at the main giant screen – one of the many – in his lair. The only light emitted from the frontal and largest of his screens, which was utterly blank, untouched. The lights of other random tech glowed and blinked faintly among the many tubes extending behind him.

Kururu didn't get it. The same had happened before at the previous excursion mentioned by Keroro. (Or the "attempt excursion," he should say.) After Keroro had bought a Gunpla with the money he was supposed to use to buy the meat for their barbecue, he offered to help another alien friend sell tickets for his concert to hopefully win the money – and the favor of the platoon – back. The rest of the platoon refused to help him, however, and feeling the guilt of having gone on the excursion without him, they rushed back to help him sell the tickets.

The next day, Keroro arranged for another "mini-excursion" that would just be at the Hinatas' house, and ordered Giroro and Tamama to buy the sukiyaki. Kururu had watched them set up the event all during the day via the cameras he had posted around the entire house, nevertheless he'd been surprised when Tamama had come down to invite him to join the platoon and the Hinatas.

Kururu hadn't understood it then, either. All of them eating so joyously with each other – it'd irritated him; brought out a certain repulsion he couldn't grasp. Yet, he'd been surprised that they invited him. He'd ruined their attempt at another excursion, poured curry spice into their sauce, scooped up and eaten all of their sukiyaki himself, then stood back and watched as the madness unfolded.

Though he'd been the one to cause the trouble, they'd started blaming each other, saying Keroro was the one to blame for asking Tamama to get Kururu, or it was Tamama's fault for actually getting him. No one suggested it was Kururu's fault. As though they accepted he was just a jerk. He didn't get that either.

_They wanted to include me even though they knew my disposition and personality...? Cheh. How ridiculous._

The white segments of the pretend-teeth on Kururu's manhole slid open, light seeping in. Kururu swiveled around in his chair to see who'd intruded upon his deep contemplation.

"Kururu-san, Ouji-sama wanted me to bring you some of Giroro-san's sweet potatoes and Tamama-san's French cake."

Oh. It was her. Kururu turned back to his gigantic computer screen, beginning to type. The processor began spinning as he entered his password – under the icon of his red-orange spiral – and went back to work decoding a secret message the Keron Army had sent to the Grand Star spaceship under the channel used only for emergencies. (He'd been decoding it during their invasion meeting too, and usually he would've had it decoded long before now with one of his many self-made programs used for decoding military mail between not only the Keron Army but other aliens' militaries as well. This message was unique in the sense it was in the emergency channel and the Keron Army had created an entirely new code purely for this one message. It was sure to be interesting to see what it said.)

He busied himself with the decoding, having found the main symbols (vowels) from their own language, Keronian, and close to discovering the next set, when Mois came around beside him. Setting the plate of baked sweet potatoes, cake, and starfruit – even one of Dororo's cannonball-heavy rice balls – to the side of his keyboard, Mois stood there with her hands clasped before her, and stared at him – no longer in her maroon, purplish, and glittery showgirl outfit. Just stared. Kururu tried to focus on his decoding, but he couldn't take it. Those annoying, inquisitive eyes of hers.

Finally, he looked up at her. "Why'd the leader ask you to bring me these things when he knows I won't like them?" he asked, wincing at the very thought of them stacking the food on the plate for him as if he'd actually eat it. He wanted no part of their silly little "excursion" or whatever-it-was.

Mois ignored his jarring question. "Why didn't you want to join them, Kururu-san? You don't usually decline their company," she commented quietly.

Kururu shrugged. "I'm working on something much more important, and the platoon doesn't need me to eat together."

"But the entire platoon is meant to be there," Mois murmured. "The first time, Ouji-sama wasn't there and everyone gave up on the excursion without him."

Kururu stopped typing, rows upon rows of Keronian code scrolling in the reflection of his swirly glasses.

"I'm sure they feel the same about you..."

A number of feelings made way in Kururu's gut this time. Repulsion; confusion; anger; and something stinging. Something that ebbed at him. He gave an anon cackle. "Ku... ku... ku. Where are they, then?"

Mois lifted her head, giving thought to what she'd just said. "Uhm, I didn't mean –!"

"I don't see any of them tearing away from their festivities as they did for our leader," Kururu stated, avoiding the worry in Mois's eyes – as if she actually cared, hah, – by swiveling his chair to take the controls of the screen opposite of her. The worried expression on her innocent face only made Kururu's mixed feeling more confused; more repulsed; and sting even more. "But why should I care?" Kururu asked wryly, cackling again. "Kukukuuu~ They're not worth my time or consideration. It's irritating how I was put in a platoon of such idiots in the first pla –"

Kururu's chair was rotated back toward Mois by her. "I know you don't mean that!" she burst, tears filling her gold-brown eyes. "You wouldn't give up the Keroro Platoon if you were given the choice! I just know it!"

Kururu remained stationary with his hands on his armrests, sweating a little. She was all up in his face with her pretty tears and absentminded emotions. It was too overwhelming. Not only that, but why did her act of sympathy have to feel so _sincere_?

_She acts like she actually knows what I'm thinking, _muttered Kururu's mental voice.

He was terrified by the very idea.

Kururu waited until she was done crying, wiping her face and sniveling as she stood back from his chair. Why was she crying so much? It wasn't as if she could possibly know...

Despite his musings, Kururu said nothing. He was afraid anything he might say would cause her to start crying uncontrollably again, and she'd say even more terrifying things.

He turned back to his screen, continuing to decode the message to Grand Star.

Mois was about to leave, tears still trickling down her cheeks, when Kururu held out the plate she'd brought earlier. It was empty save Dororo's shiny, black rice ball. He was picking out his teeth with a toothpick, chocolate, starfruit carpels, and bits of sweet potato around his mouth. "Take this back to the mini excursion."

The only tears in Mois's eyes slid down her cheeks. As she took the plate in her hands, her lips spread in a grin. "Of course."

She left Kururu's lair, leaving him to his decoding. Once certain she was gone, Kururu leaned back in his chair, propping a leg on top of the other. He laughed so loud it echoed around all the extension tubes in his secluded lair. "Kuuukukukuku~ Kuuukukukuku~!"

Hidden in a compartment of one of his armrests, Kururu had accumulated a stash of Giroro's grenades.

"She didn't notice the circular crease I left in Dodoro-kun's rice ball where I slipped in one of Senpai's grenades~"

He tapped a button found on his armchair; the platoon showed up through the cameras he had posted in the base, in every angle he could ever want. Natsumi had found Keroro after all, and was currently grinding his head between her knuckles for trying to skip out on his chores. Just then, Mois entered with Dororo's rice ball on a plate, set it down on the table in the center. Kururu's finger hovered above the button that would trigger its detonation.

"Kuku~" When it blew up in their faces, that would surely elicit an interesting reaction. He'd have entertainment for days.

* * *

**I figured it was time I write a Kururu story since he's one of my favorite Sgt. Frog characters, so yeah, here yah go~! This is a fanfic dedicated primarily to my best friend, Tsuskasa Hirokumo. (Hopefully it's a surprise.)**

**You've given me so much amazing anime merchandise and I still haven't gotten you anything in return, and I can't even think up what I'd give you... This is the only thing I can think of that you can't already buy! ...If you want it. I'll still try to think of something real I can get you instead of just words on a screen. T.T"**

**This was really quite a joy to write, delving into the personality of a character I don't normally think about. It gave me a new view on Kururu.**

**I tried, friend. I really did. I hope you like it... or something... eh heh... (It was all based on my own theories, so sorry if there's a lot you disagree with...)**

**(says cheesily) Also, I just wanted to show my appreciation for our friendship/broship... I hope we really do remain best friends forever! T^T**


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